After most ED 1 Decisions, some students are happy, others disappointed.
My seniors have worked hard, perfecting applications since the spring. Together, we crafted essays that express their defining qualities and fine-tuned attention-getting activity lists. I helped them honestly choose majors (including undeclared/exploratory) that speak to their direction. We balanced college lists between Likely, Possible, and Reach categories. That’s why many students have been receiving “You’re In!” messages for a while, some with scholarships for over $100,000 over four years. And yes, some of those are Reaches.
When students set their hearts on Unlikely colleges (those which deny 85% plus applicants), I try to help them manage expectations. “Unlikely” colleges are truly “Wild Cards.” Every applicant is highly qualified, and may include up to 26,000+ valedictorians, an equal number of salutatorians, and students from all over the globe, many of whom have won academic competitions and published notable work.
While we all hope for good news, assuming admission is unrealistic. It may feel personal, but it is not. Institutional priorities dictate if a school is looking for students to fill their new data science major, more tuba players, or more kids from Idaho.
I make clear that the competition in an uber-competitive program (i.e., a STEM field like Computer Science or Engineering) in a most-selective institution is brutal. Admissions must make tough decisions among the highest achievers in the field–in the US and internationally. And while admission to some colleges seems achievable, applying to the business school may result in a denial.
A few students were deferred from a college that defers 90% of its applicants every year. I am relieved that although they were disappointed, they were not shocked.
Denials and deferrals are part of the college application process.
“If you are denied, repeat this mantra: ‘There will be other, better colleges for me and it is their loss.’ LET IT GO. Don't obsess about why it happened. It is out of your control. And most importantly, this is NOT a referendum on your success at college, your ability to have a happy life or your value as a person.”
I’m rooting for you, from now through May 1st.
Enjoy the holidays!
The thesis of Jennifer Breheny Wallace’s book “Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic — and What We Can Do About It” really resonates with me.
She recognizes that today’s socioeconomic conditions, not just bumper sticker envy, drive parents’ fears about their kids’ success. However, most of the families immersed in achievement-related stress–and its severe mental health consequences–are in the top 25% of household incomes. I encourage you to read it–here’s an excerpt (with my edits for length and emphasis) from an interview Wallace did in September.
“...achievement becomes toxic when we tangle up our entire sense of self and value with our achievements. When you have to achieve in order to matter. That …pressure is felt by students today…from parents who just want what’s best for their kids; from teachers who are under their own pressures to hit certain standards; and schools both public and private that are under their own pressures to perform.
GAZETTE: What do children, particularly adolescents, need most from their parents?
BREHENY WALLACE: In my research, I sought out the “healthy strivers,” the students who were able to achieve success in healthy ways…these kids felt a deep sense of mattering. They felt deeply valued for who they were by their family, by their friends, and by their community separate from their external achievements.” This means they enhanced the lives of others.
“The kids who were struggling the most felt like their mattering was contingent on their performance; that their parents only valued or cared about them when they were performing. Or, for other kids who weren’t doing well, they heard those messages from their parents, but they were never expected to add value back to anyone other than themselves...”
For parents, I’d focus on a phrase from Suniya Luthar, the resilience researcher: “Minimize criticism. Prioritize affection.” Find ways to let your kids know that they matter, separate from their achievements.”
Now, we have a new digital, adaptive SAT. There is a great deal of information about it at this link from Compass https://www.compassprep.com/digital_sat/ and in my students' standardized testing file in the Less College Stress system. I hope that students find this new test comfortable to take, but everyone should try it out to see if they prefer using pencil and paper vs. testing on the computer. (That hadn't occurred to me, but I heard it from two students.) I can always provide free practice tests for my students; they receive diagnostic results back that show their strong areas and where they may need extra help.
The ACT is unchanged--for now. I still encourage all students to test, helping them understand that their test scores may be helpful at some colleges and not at others. We pick and choose where it's beneficial to submit them based on data and information I've gotten from admissions offices.
Fortunately, roughly 80% of colleges are officially test optional. Despite this, test scores remain a factor in admissions at most highly selective universities. Admissions officers report that there is a decrease in the importance of test scores overall and expect this trend to continue (though an excellent test score still makes a difference).
However, without standardized test scores as a metric for evaluation, highly selective colleges must focus more on an applicant’s academic accomplishment (choosing the highest rigor and earning A's), intellectual curiosity, and commitment to social good.
*A survey by the National Association for College Admission Counseling (NACAC) noted that competitive colleges “have many applicants with similarly high grades and test scores, and therefore tend to consider a broader range of factors, including positive character traits and a commitment to improving their communities.”
Colleges are eager to admit students who engage in activities that show a commitment to the common good. Looking for ways to serve others that resonate with you? Ask me for ideas.